Back in the 1950s, when the UFO contactee craze was about as trendy as hula hoops, there was a man named Gabriel Green who claimed to be in touch with beings from Alpha Centauri. Green was the founder and president of the Amalgamated Flying Saucer Clubs of America and, at the behest of his space brothers, ran for President in 1960 on a platform of leadership by enlightened direction. I don’t know how long his campaign lasted, but I do know he later withdrew in order to support then Senator John F. Kennedy. Lest you think Green had a screw loose, bear in mind that the election of 1960 was extremely close, so I’m sure JFK was happy for any support he could get. And Green must have had some pull, because when he ran for the Senate in 1962 he drew over 170,000 votes.Now that we seem to have narrowed the choice for 2012 between two candidates, I was wondering if there was anyone out there who might add a little enlightened direction to the current political campaign.
Thanks to the Federal Election Commission’s website, I found a few candidates who would definitely make this election more colorful. One such candidate is Jonathon “The Impaler” Sharkey, who is a professional wrestler and self-professed vampire. Mr. Sharkey is a perennial candidate who advocates the drinking of blood and believes in capital maiming, impaling and punishment. He also once called George W. Bush a “wuss.”
Then there’s the ever-lovable Jimmy McMillan, sporting sideburns and mustache reminiscent of our 21st President Chester Alan Arthur. McMillan has been making quite a living off his 2010 New York Gubernatorial campaign slogan, “The Rent Is Too Damn High.” He formed his own political party (The Rent is Too Damn High Party) and a website (therentistoodamnhigh.org) where he sells videos, T-Shirts, “Rent Is Too Damn High” music and advertises his radio call-in show from Detroit. I imagine he usually talks about housing.
McMillan and Sharkey are just two of the over 380 other candidates – Republican, Democrat, Independent, Constitution, Other, None and Unknown – who filed for the 2012 Presidential Election. The list includes Jack Fellure, a Republican turned Prohibitionist, who filed on November 5, 2008, barely a day after President Obama was elected. Mr. Fellure has run for President every four years since 1988 on a platform he says is based on the 1611 King James Bible. He advocates Bibles in the schools, the elimination of the liquor and pornography industries, banning all abortions and blaming America’s problems on dope addicts, sex perverts and atheists.
At one point in my research I was feeling a little overwhelmed and I started to wonder whatever happened to Gabriel Green. Well, it seems he passed away in 2001, but I haven’t been able to find much information on the Amalgamated Flying Saucer Clubs of America. Green has a fairly comprehensive article on Wikipedia and a few interviews posted on YouTube. While I was reading about Green, I realized that there was an innocence and naivete about him that stands in stark contrast to the dozens of candidates currently ranting about guns, taxes and legislating what is loosely defined as a Judeo-Christian Heritage. I wish Green were here now, because, with the current climate of cultural and political divisiveness, I think a little Alpha Centaurian Enlightenment would be a much welcomed distraction.
Paul McDonald is a writer, educator and graduate student who thinks too much. He can be reached atThis email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it.
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